Wonderful weirdos ahead! Fasten your shitbelts for part five!
13. ICELAND – Hatari – Hatrid Mun Sigra
The Song: Someone somewhere on the web, sorry for the lack of copyright here, described this as metalschlagertechno (those three genres in any kind of combo-word anyway) and that’s pretty much spot on. (update: it’s Astrid & Guri, thanks for the reminder @YouSkinnyBitch from the awesome escnation.com messageboard community.) The industrial electronic beat is straight up my alley and is the basis for my unconditional love for it. Loving the smart build-up, even if I could have done without the key change. Then again it’s probably part of the criticism this entry is bathing in. It’s kinda reminiscent of the atmosphere of the retro game Red Faction (obscure reference 911!). The lyrics are truly painful cause painfully true and deliciously exaggerated. It’s basically genius and flying straight into my all time top 5.
Standout line: “The void will swallow all” And here I was thinking *I* am a drama queen…
The Voice: Not a fan at all of grunting, it almost physically hurts me when I hear it, but it simply works here in this doomsday setting. The beat helps distracting from it enough for me to make it tolerable, and there’s enough light and shade in the pronunciation to make it bearable. The switch to falsetto makes for a nice change and gives the entry the balance it needs, even if said falsetto is at times fragile at best. Here’s hoping that’ll be fixed come Tel Aviv.
The Performance: The S&M setting fits the song so well, it’s just a shame that some people won’t be able to look past it. But the Hatar-universe is definitely cleverly put together and the entire package is rock solid. Loving the tiny vogue moments (of course) and the ‘drummer’ is so devilish it’s almost actually scary. (By the way: take a moment to check their bio on Eurovision.tv – you won’t regret it)
In one line: Hate will Hatari must prevail.
PERSONAL TOTAL: 
WILL IT QUALIFY? I am possibly/probably too enamored by it to be able to judge its chances properly. It could be that one stretch too far for Europe. It should at least make it through to Saturday, no? Once it’s there: who knows? Could be last, could win the whole thing. No, that last bit is wishful thinking, it’s too polarizing to get any kind of medal, I fear.
14. ESTONIA – Victor Crone – Storm
The Song: Are we sure this isn’t Denmark? Cause: generic, 911! It’s competent enough: it’s got the lower verses to draw you in and then it explodes neatly in the chorus. But I feel like we’ve heard this a gazillion times over the past few years, in charts and national finals all over the globe. It just doesn’t rattle my cage. Like, at all.
Standout line: “For a million reasons that I find but I might, I might be all wrong” I’m pretty sure you’re all wrong.
The Voice: Just a bit shaky in the verses but quite convincing in the chorus. I can’t tell the difference between Victor and the Finnish singer though, which might be a bit of a problem in a competition.
The Performance: Oh look, a disappearing guitar. Swell idea, it worked wonders for Anna Bergendahl so by all means: keep the trick for Tel Aviv. Of course it’s gonna have thunder and lightning, but will that make it exciting? (Gosh, I can’t believe I’m using Russia 2016 as a pun)
In one line: Storms don’t last forever, remember?
PERSONAL TOTAL:
WILL IT QUALIFY? This might sound familiar enough to get people voting. This and Finland might, quite ironically, cancel each other out though.
15. PORTUGAL – Conan Osiris – Telemóveis
The Song: This is definitely the semi of testing the boundaries. I love me some out of the box venturing, but there doesn’t even seem to a box here anymore and it feels a bit unnerving. Which in its turn feels exciting and bewildering at the same time. I like how it’s different, I simply don’t know if I actually like it. It’s more art than anything else, basically.
Standout line: “If life doesn’t stop and you don’t have the courage to pick up you already know what will happen” That’s deep, man.
The Voice: It might be a special kind of singing technique or it simply might be the color of his voice, but I’m not really a fan of Conan’s vocals. It somehow all feels too monotonous.
The Performance: Again highly conceptual and this part of the art exhibit I kinda like. The arrow-fingers and the metal beard are quite something, as are the moves and the outfits.
In one line: At least it won’t be forgotten.
PERSONAL TOTAL:
WILL IT QUALIFY? Who can say anymore? Due to the many question marks it will undoubtedly raise throughout the continent, I’m gonna say no. But maybe, just maybe, Europe will surprise me.
CURRENT DIMIVISION STANDINGS
Iceland
Slovenia
Cyprus – Czech Republic – Belarus – Belgium – Australia – Portugal
Finland – Serbia – Estonia
Montenegro – Poland – Hungary – Georgia
Dimivision 