We’re running up to the 2012 Contest, all entries for Baku have been chosen and it’s time to take a closer look at what we can expect to see and hear at the end of May. I’m reviewing everything in order of draw: I’ll first give my general thoughts on the countries’ choices, then I’ll subject them to the DIMI test and finally I’ll score them, accompagnied by a predicition of how I think they’ll do in Baku. I’ll be tackling them in pairs & on the menu today: Denmark & Russia.
13. DENMARK – Should’ve known better
A pinch of Seal (the first line in the chorus is VERY Crazy), a whiff of Everything But The Girl (like Sahara misses rain?!), a spoon of Alanis Morissette (those floating oh-oh’s in the bridge come straight out of Thank you) and the entire baseline by the cello from Oasis’ Wonderwall – this is what we call ‘stealing with pride’ in marketing. There are worse songs you could use though. And yet it still sounds utterly Denmark-at-Eurovision – Soluna Samay did a great job integrating it all into a nifty little pop-rock song and she sells it well. Those vocals are very confident and the only remark I’d have is that horrible (spontaneous yes, but horrible) styling in the national final. Just hire Tim Gunn, darling.
Checkpoint DIMI:
Daft? Hardly. Bar the styling of course.
Intriguing? The nifty copy-paste job is.
Modern? This could have survived in any of the past 20 editions of the Contest, which is its strength ànd its weakness at the same time.
International? Without a shadow of a doubt.
Personal score: 15/20 – Prediction: Final
14. RUSSIA – Party for everybody
You have got to be fracking joking. As far as joke entries go I always try to see where they’re coming from and what they’re trying to do but this can only be described as Cheap. Call me a puritan all you want. Half of the Babushki don’t even know what they’re doing and it’s nothing but a chorus basically. Plus it’s annoying after 30 seconds. It’s things like this that give the Contest the reputation it has and I hope they’ll be punished for it. But I already know this will probably score big time. Makes me sad really. Party for everybody…but Dimi.
Checkpoint DIMI:
Daft? No, demented.
Intriguing? Their footwear is, it seems (judging by the focus it got in the national final).
Modern? Are you kidding me?
International? Brainless entertainment knows no boundaries either.
Personal score: 3/20 – Prediction: Final
Tomorrow: Hungary & Austria
Dimivision 
Denmark: I really enjoyed the Danish final, but I’m not happy with the winner. To me, this song is very generic, 13 in a dozen. I too keep hearing Seal’s ‘crazy’ when the chorus starts and it annoys me, so don’t get me started on the outfit. I can hear it’s a Dimi song, but I’ll be booing softly in the background :p 11/20
Russia: one thing is certain: this time, the russian televote wasn’t rigged… I watched the russian final for hours (25 songs!) and then they chose this… bloody hell! The only positive thing is the really small old lady, she’s so cute I wanna hug and save her… I think she got kidnapped by the others and suffers from stockholm-syndrom 1/20